almost all of us carry around this same underlying belief of "i'm not good enough " - or some variation of how we are flawed or inadequate . yours maybe "i'm not smart enough" , "i'm not worthy" or "i'm not loveable ". it doesn't really matter what edition of this " i'm not okay " manual you have , when you don't love yourself , you hold yourself back from receiving life's richest experience : unconditional love . it's like having the winning lottery ticket & not showing up to claim the millions . to make matters worst , you look outside yoursel to try to fill yourself up - with food , drugs & alcohol , sex , achievements , relationships , you name it . its the ultimate bottomless pit .this explains why so many people are overweight , addicted , frustrated with their jobs or their relationships and passing unhappiness & lack of love on to everyone eles . kids , family , friends and even strangers. the truth is that untill we fill the inner void , nothing from the outside can make us feel "enough " , at least for very long . you may be thinking , i've hear this before , but how do i do it ? the good news is you've already begun . reading this book has most likely caused you to reexamine your thoughts about what is love . and it has set you on the path of learning to access unconditional love & go about clearing away the blocks to living in a real way in your every dy life .
when you love yourself unconditionally , your kind to yourself , have compassion for yourself , and accept yourself as you are. you don't love yourself for " good reason " , such as your talents & good qualities which are the basis of your self -esteem . while self - esteem is healthy and important in moderation , it has its limitations . loving yourself for good reason keeps you focused on external things , like accomplishments & successes . and what happens if you can't maintain those positive qualities ? yourself - esteem disappears or worst yet it turns into self pity and harshness.you beat yourself up for letting yourself down. when you strengthen your self - love , you stop condemning & abandoning your yourself & start being there for yourself , no matter what - even in the midst of pain , in the midst of the things you think about yourself that are unlovable. you're also able to be fully empowered. this means you create appropriate boundaries & take responsibility for your own love experiences . this then becomes the basis for loving others ..from the book " love for no reason " by marci shimoff
"love is not an action , not a giving and receiving , its a state of being . theres only one true form of it & that is unconditional... love that isn't unconditional is just need . everyone has unconditional love , it is our true nature " tom stone ...writer