The Luckyone's Place: May 2012

In an ideal world , the title of this article would be " 5 Ways to Feel More Powerful " but as things stand , many people feel powerless , and social trends that drain personal power only grow stronger .Whether you struggle due to the recession , a controlling spouse , or the anonymity of routine work , it's crucial to find a way to limit that feeling in your day ~ to~ day life.

Before talking about power , let's clarify what power isn't . It isn't a force that you use like a weapon to get your own way .It isn't a suppression of what you don't like about yourself to achieve a perfect ideal that doesn't exist in the first place .It isn't money , status , possessions , or any other material surrogate. There are countless people sitting in the lap of luxury who feel even more powerless than the average person does. This is so because the issues of power are all "in here " , where you relate to yourself . Now we can addressthe five things that can help conquer that feeling of powerlessness.~ Deepak Chopra
1.Stop giving away your power.
Becoming powerless doesn't happen in a single dramatic stroke , like the barbarian hordes breaking down your door & burning down your house.It's a process, for most people, the process is gradual so most don't notice it . They are more than happy, in fact to give away their power by degrees. Why ? Because being powerless seems like an easy way to be popular , accepted and protected.

Thus you are giving away your power when you please others in order to fit in . Or when you follow the opinions of the crowd. Or when you decide that others matter more than you do . Or when you let someone who seems to have more power take charge of you .

It can often seem right ~ or proper ~ to sit modestly by in the background , holding accepted opinions , living for your children , or letting a controlling person run roughshod over you in order to keep the peace . In small & large ways , however , these kinds of decisions reduce your self ~ worth , & without self ~ worth , you cannot rid yourself of your powerlessness.

2. Examine why it's "good" to be a victim.
Once you start chipping away at your self`worth ,it's a short step to becoming a victim .I define being a victim as engaging in " selfless pain". In other words , by telling yourself that you don't really count , you can make the suffering you endure into kind of a virtue, as all martyrs do .It's "good " when you serve a higher spiritual purpose ~ or so some religion suggest but what if there is no higher purpose ?
Most victims feel good about worrying all the time, but worry makes you far more vulnerable to bad things in general , since worry is so all~consuming that the mind isn't free & alert enough to tell real threats from imaginary ones . Worry feels like a protection ~ when it is exactly the opposite.
Victims find lots of other "good " reasons for their plight .They are forgiving of an abusive spouse , because forgiveness is considered spiritual.They enable an addict , because tolerance & acceptance of others is equally spiritual . But if you stand back , you'll see that victims in such situations are deliberately bringing suffering upon themselves , which not only confirms their powerlessness, it encourages it to grow & grow .The victim is always being acted upon.There are enough abusers , addicts , rage~aholics , control freaks , and petty tyrants out there to drain the power from anyone who volunteers to play the role of "victim."
Having given too much of themselves , the first step for victims is to realize that their role is voluntary.They are not trapped by fate , destiny or the will of God.Their role is a personal choice, and they can choose differently.

3. Delelop your core self.
Human beings are the only creature who do not mature automatically. A baby chick has no choice but to turn into a chicken .But the world is full of people stuck in childhood & adolescence , no matter how old they happen to be . For us , to mature is a decision . Adulthood is an achievement , one that requires ~ and results in ~ personal power.' This can take decades , but it starts with a vision of the "core self ." This is the part of you that connects to reality , placing you @ the center of experiences that you personally create. To have a core self is to be the author of your own story , it is the exact opposite of being a victim , you must live a life author by others.

4. Align yourself with the flow of evolution , or personal growth.Once you establish your core self as a goal , your path will unfold & you will evolve .This evolution is wobbly @ first , everyone has at least some elements of ignorance & immaturity . But " thanks to free will , you can help guide your own evolution . The simple fact is that we all desire more & better things for ourselves . If those more or better things are good for our growth , then we are guiding our own positive & powerful evolution . In India the make a distinction between dharma & adharma. Dharma includes whatever naturally upholds life ; happiness , truth , duty , virtue , wonder , worship , reverence , appreciation , nonviolence , love respect . On the other hand , adharma consists of choices that do not support life naturally anger , violence fear , control dogmatism , skepticism , unvirtuous acts, prejudice , addiction intolerance & unconsciousness in general.

For our purpose , dharma is the ultimate power .It easily supports you , a single individual. What is asked of you is that you is that you honestly look at your everyday life and the choices & decrease the adharmic.