Life is not always kind. We don't always get what we want .We don't even get what our parents want for us , which at least would make them happy.Sometimes everything goes south at once : The longed - for love doesn't show up or goes away : the dream job is given to an inexperienced , 2 faced brown noser ; you smash a window & your left standing there , Thinking "The best part of life was way back then in my 20 's , and now its just getting through it..day after day. " Which is exactly when you must remember a little secret that I am about to share with you . All of us - the darkest & unluckiest of us - get seven particular moments , those brief ,unexpected times when the stars do more than align ; they communally redirect their light expressly to illuminate the value of our wee , earthly existence . These moments sometimes go unnoticed & are almost always unexpected. They are not subject to the vicissitudes of success or failure. They are not something you can blame yourself for not experiencing sooner or flog yourself into experiencing now. They are on their own time schedule . They happen to you or will happen to you sooner or later . They key is not letting them slip by uncelebrated.
1. You ( senselessly ) win .
You toss your business card into a bowl at a Chinese restaurant & win six free egg rolls every month for a year. Or you pick up the phone & hear a stranger asking you the names of all four Beatles , which you recite to them without skipping a beat and he screams you just won a dish washer ... This feeling is not the same as winning @ a craps table or a lotto win , this is about a windfall that you 're not even sure you want - say , a deluxe all - expenses - paid trip to Hackensack ,New Jersey -- but fills you with a great , swelling of joy @ getting something undreamed of ...and its all for you.2. You're seen .
It happens without fanfare . Someone somewhere looks across the room & sees past the face your family gave you . They also sees past the face that you put on over that face , the one composed of TV gestures & mysterious magazine - made smiles & the smooth , dull , blank look that over takes your eyes when you decide you do not cry in front of other people .This someone sees , you down to your intelligence , your fear of being alone , your ability to whistle on pitch . It might be the teacher who asks if you would like the honor of extra tutoring . It might be the grocery store owner giving you credit every month , who doesn't mind a bit . It might even be the friend who thinks your just sexy as hell & even though he claims he's straight likes to turn it on with you when he's around.There is somebody out there that gets you . 3. You get the opportunity to learn about something bigger than yourself . I know what this one sounds like : You get to go through something horrible & gut wrenching & then we'll pretend there is a silver lining . But that's not what I mean. I'm talking about the awakening of grace, the time in life when you first begin to accrue the kind of wisdom that will allow you to feel for a friend when you know that there r days when he's not all there mentally & completely powerless & you understand this because you are too .
4. You're spared .
Prior to the age of seatbelts , you were a child crawling around in the back of a station wagon & the door opened . You didn't fall out . Or later on , you were reaching for a distant leaf in the gutter and stumbled off the ladder & landed without a scratch .You didn't die . In other words, you did get a chance to live . 5. Somebody comes back . One of the worst things in life is that people leave - and worse, they leave you feeling that a / you didn't do the right thing to make them stay , or b / you did the thing that made them leave . or c/ if time stopped , you would leave instead & make them feel all the terrible , painful crap you're currently feeling .But at some point . one of those leave 'ers comes back .Maybe they want to start over . maybe they want to say their sorry , Maybe they want to just say hey and smoke one with you .( I made that part up ;@})Leaving you kissing the ground and looking all hot and bothered.And am not making up this part.
6. You are right .So many times in life we are right & wish we weren't ( You're going to lose your job ! ) And then there are the glorious , life - affirming moments , such as when I told my father the glue stick was not ChapStick and he chose to dis agree with me .
7. You're loved.
Love seems to be a given . It seems so obvious .All people are in your life with the responsibility to love you : parents , brothers , partners , nieces , babies and friends . A few will fail you , but most won't .And yet each time they express that love , it's unique . It's so insanely specific , what the other will adore about you & what you will adore about him or her .Who is it who loved or loves or will love you ? The guy who left an anonymous note on your desk , or the hot one who can't help but watch you on the bus and smile the whole time. The funny , laid- back , occasionally loud man - perfect for you ;you're occasional hard of hearing - you haven't met yet but will ? It may be that you haven't had all seven of these moments yet . But the odds are that you have ,and here is the sweet part of the deal - it's possible , if not extremely likely , that you will get the chance to have each of these moments over & over & over . 70 or 700 or 7 million times , but each time differently .Each time will be new & astonishing once again ...author Leigh - Newman